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Women experimenting with lesbian sex for the first time might feel nervous and uncertain. This hesitation isn’t limited to lesbian sex; it is a normal reaction to any new sexual behaviour including oral sex or anal sex, and is nothing of which to be ashamed.

Despite an ongoing shift to social acceptance of ‘non-traditional’ relationships, there is still a stigma attached to, and a general misunderstanding of lesbian sex or gay sex. Part of the hesitation many women feel about engaging in lesbian sex stems from persistent societal pressure to be heterosexual (so-called ‘normal’) or to adhere to religious teachings that insist oral sex or anal sex is a sin.

Women might also be nervous about exposing themselves to another woman in an intimate situation. Even the most confident women tend to have insecurities about their bodies, and it’s difficult for anyone not to compare their bodies to the people around them. In a lesbian sex scenario, a woman may feel threatened by her partner’s appearance. Again, this is completely normal. Regardless of the kind of relationship you have, true intimacy is an _expression of emotion and physicality that becomes better and stronger as the relationship deepens. When you are truly intimate with someone, whether engaging in lesbian sex, gay sex or teen sex, those uncertainties will disappear.

If you are struggling with your sexual identity and want to try lesbian sex, or even if you are sure of your sexual orientation, find a caring partner who understands your feelings and who won’t push. Being physically intimate with a woman may feel unnatural at first, just as the first heterosexual experiences can be clumsy and awkward. Don’t be afraid to tell your partner what you want. Touch each other affectionately. Hug and kiss. Massage each other and let your physical sense of each other grow until you are more comfortable before diving into oral sex or more complicated sexual positions.

After you have had lesbian sex a couple times, you may decide it’s not what you really want. Or, you may discover that only a woman can truly understand another woman’s physical desires and that you are able to reach levels of sexual pleasure that were unattainable in the past. Whatever your decision, the key is to be comfortable with your body and with your decision.

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